How the fuck should I know?

Rainbows, unicorns, customers, clients, ponies, dicks, shit like that. Stickman comics where Grant's character always wears a dress.

Friday, August 15, 2014

Day One

Oh shit bitches.  It is that time again.  GenCon 2014 day one recap. Busy as shit, there has to be some sort of critical nerd-mass limit in the universe and we have to be close to reaching it. I don't know how much bigger the event can get without crumbling under its massive, stale, slightly greasy weight.

That doesn't mean it is bad, quite the opposite in fact. It is great and like the games it honors the con itself is full of swings and roundabouts. For example you might turn a corner and find yourself to be the most attractive/socially acceptable person in sight. Fucking score right? Sure, until you turn the next corner and see a Khal Drogo/Khaleesi combo that could be stand-ins for the cast. Nothing like a six-pack and some dragons to put your ass back in its place. Swings and roundabouts, from bottom to top nearly every facet of socioeconomic status and physical condition can be found. Geezers playing miniature WW2 battles alongside blue haired girls with Fox tails and mood activated ears.

That's a real thing, ears on a headband that scan your brain and react to the readings. I know it doesn't make any goddamn sense but that's the way it is.

The exhibition hall this year is even bigger and more intimidating than before. A massive sea of humanity surging up and down the aisles as if compelled by some tidal force. It takes discipline and fortitude to navigate the channels but with perseverance and a little luck it can be rewarding.

This year AEG and Paizo have lines for their booths that begin outside the exhibition hall and occasionally extend outside the building itself.  For once again just weaves their line through the hall with little concern for anyone else. What the fuck people? FFG can be had cheaper online or similarly priced at your FLGS* and that doesn't involve any interactions with the hipsters, shitlords and douchebags that staff their booth. AEG was releasing Doomtown or some such nonsense I didn't pay much attention as I try to find things that aren't easily available on Amazon. Not knocking AEG or Paizo and knocking FFG a little(they make some good games but come the fuck on) but I would rather delve into the bowels of the hall and come up with some unknown gem or interesting failure.

SIDE NOTE THIS FUCKING TRUMPET PLAYER NEEDS TO LEARN ANOTHER SONG THE STAR WARS THEME SONG FOR 45 MINUTES IS BAD FUCKING NEWS.

With that said tonight(this post is a day late) I will recap today(actually today) and show some of the games.

Last night the burglar alarm went off and dealing with that from a different state is a pain in the dick that delays posts.

Peace bitches.

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